Learn how to drown

Meet the thirty-year-old captain by day, hero by–whenever he sees a distressed swimmer, Kevin Campion. I actually heard nothing about this, and had no real interest in it until I saw the CPR certified dreamboat captain (what I would give to be the dummy he practiced on) on gawker.com today. Would you look at that face? And as far as Seattle flannel goes, not bad! Oh, the story: He rescued someone from drowning and is humbly refusing a reward. Even hotter. He doesn't want your money, he just wants to surf. This story is just proof that nobody cares what's going on in the world unless you're hot. Just ask Natalie Holloway when you find her.

Here's a pic of the hot hero. Look, there's just enough space to Photoshop yourself next to him.